Tattoes and Body Jewellery

shock value body piercing

The Dilemma of the First Time

A grand dinner-party; everyone was there, exultant and ecstatic, mingling and chanting, making a festivity of it all. But for him, it was a turn off, because she wasn’t present. He subconsciously craved for her presence, and prayed for it as he tightened his grip around the beer bottle. No sooner than later, “as a consequence of his prayers”, she arrived, to amend the situation-his predicament.

As soon as she stepped in, the light she radiated lightened up the dimly lit hall. And the music that had reached its crescendo and quite thunderous, seemed to play in the background. To him, nothing can ever overshadow his utter attention for her, once she is present, and even when she is not.

“God, this is obsessive,” he thought. His gaze fixed on her, consuming every detail of the moment about her. Such a faultless beauty and unblemished smile, tall and full-bodied, with richly dark hair that reflected light. It was the third time he would see her entirely in blue, and twice consecutively: yesterday was one, and today the dress seemed shorter, and loose, yet he could still see that glorious figure that had set his mind on the course of chaos and disarray. His desire was on dire fire.

“Fidelis, do you know that the effective cure for brucellosis is slaughter policy?” Timothy probed again, peering through his glasses in a comical disposition. This time the question was modified in an attempt to be less annoying, but without success. He reluctantly shifted his attention from her and gave him “the look”; this muted him. The interruption made him partially rest his indulgence in her for a while as he thought about Timothy’s psyche.

They have been friends for a while, good friends, and he had learnt to tolerate and accept him. However the nerdish attitude about him can be quite overwhelmingly infuriating. “How is it possible for a 21 years old college student to be so unsociable?” he thought. “The answer, as a matter of fact is yes,” he concluded. They both have this similar trait, perhaps which was what brought them together, but he believed his’ is mild and there is willingness to change and improve.

This finishing thought brought his full consciousness back to the girl; a woman in fact. By this time she was well seated among her peers and apparently enjoying the party. Her laughter resounded in his ears as she freely gesticulated, bringing more life to the room. What he found most fascinating was the fact that her beauty extends within. She was such a people’s person; this value can only be accrued to her warm appeal, effortlessly noticeable and incredibly adorable. There was hardly a time he had seen her alone; she was always flocked by friends and mates alike, whom she entertained with ease. A kind of person there was no dull moment about. Unfortunately, maybe fortunately, she was the reverse of him.

They’ve been sitting at the table in the corner for a while, taking solace in their solitude and a bottle of Viju juice each.”You like her, uh?” Timothy interrupted once again, however, this time it was condoned. Fidelis looked at him with a blank but calm expression. He wondered if he was the type he could relate with on such sensitive subject. If it had been an issue with pathology, there was no doubt Timothy would’ve given an excellent judgment. He could be credited any day for being a living veterinary dictionary. But in this case, he was more than sceptical. In fact he was certain that Timothy was out of place when it comes to the boy-girl thing.

“Don’t think I’m daft, I’ve noticed you staring at her all week and…”

“Yes. I like her. So?”

“Then go tell her.”

Fidelis burst into an irrepressible laughter. “Just like that?” he muffled. He had forgotten how impetuously funny Timothy could be, extending his “all-in-all” knowledge to matters out of his range in the most absurd manner. Such as the time when he had claimed that getting them into the school’s club house for the maiden show of Miss Queen Elizabeth Hall for invited guests only, was a piece of cake.

With a genius plan, he had declared to the bouncer manning the entrance of the club house that he was a well-known pimp with a misplaced invitation. The bouncer had malevolently struck him across the face asserting that his lie insults his intelligence, after he kept persisting on it.

“Yes. You’ve to be brave about it. That’s what love is about.” Timothy answered.

“Who told you I’m in love? What do you know about love?”

“Your attitude tells me. And I’m human like everybody else to know all about love” Timothy retorted. Fidelis was taken aback by his response. It was one of the few times they’ve discussed such issue, and it was the first time they had reached this depth about it. He was somewhat surprised about the confident manner he affirmed himself. He might’ve been wrong thinking he is just a geek, whose passion revolved books and boring artifacts. But he wasn’t about to let Timothy of all people prove him nave on this subject.

“So you think because I looked at her, I’m in love with her?”

“You don’t look at her, you stare at her, and you’ve been doing so for ages. Brother, you are madly, senselessly, foolishly, out-of-your-mind in love.”

Fidelis suppressed his anger and feigned laughter. “So that is your conclusion. Well I’m sorry to disappoint you, I’m not in love. And can we please ease on that word?”

“Denial; the first proof” Timothy persisted.

Then, it took an unfavorable turn for Fidelis. “It seems this geek is having fun at the expense of his plight,” he thought.

“You’re starting to get on my nerves!” Fidelis fumed.

“Christ. What’re you mad about,” Timothy said, as he recoiled into his seat, his shirt appearing oversize than usual and his tie knot ridiculously shifting to an awkward angle. . “I’m only trying to help. You don’t have to get all sensitive about it.” He sat upright now to assert himself: “Don’t think I can’t discern the fact that we are here chiefly because of her”. He shifted his chair backwards to create space to cross his legs-to portray confidence-as he continued his claim.

“On Thursday, after the end of the first class, you hastily went to Bashir to purchase the party’s tickets for both of us at a price not only expensive for you at its usual rate, but also selling at a premium due to its limited amount. And let me emphasize the fact that you bought a ticket for me, not because you exceptionally like me, but because we both overheard her-the girl you’ve been stalking-saying she is enthusiastic about the forthcoming party. So you knew quite well she would be here” He narrated, pausing to seep on his drink. “You only wanted me to accompany you here….For what?”

It was Fidelis’ turn to withdraw as he realized he was fooling himself thinking he had been playing it in the dark all this while.

“So you’ve been observant?” he said soothingly, hoping to placate Timothy.

“Yes, I’ve. But don’t worry because you didn’t make a mistake choosing the right chaperon for this event,” he answered. That answer brought another round of laughter from Fidelis, who slightly held his side for the sake of his sheer comedy. Timothy adjusted his spectacles and sat unbending, with a resemblance of a newscaster about to give the head-line news, he said: “I have had two girlfriends in the past and I am with the third at present, whom I happen to give her “the first kiss” just three days ago. You, my friend, have never had any, let alone kiss one”.

Fidelis couldn’t take it anymore; to him Timothy was being hilarious. If not for the loud music, his raucous laughter would’ve reverberated in the hall. However, he stopped suddenly, realizing that Timothy was still sitting in that same newscaster’s manner, unflinching, and his eyes glaring as if it was going to pierce his glasses.

“Christ! He is serious” he thought. Fidelis adjusted his sitting position as he lifted the empty bottle he had accidentally knocked over while laughing riotously. At that point, things took a dramatic turn and there was a tension that was quite unbearable-for Fidelis.

“Who is she?” he queried.

“That’s inconsequential.”

“You’re a liar.”

“Deborah”

“Debby-quiet Debby-your study mate?”

“Yes”

“When did this start?”

“You ask a lot of irrelevant questions” Timothy patronized

“Don’t deride me. I am not the simpleton here.” Fidelis rejoined.

Neither of them talked for a while. Timothy reclined his full weight on the chair and looked upward to the ceiling to count the balloons or stare at the various embellishment-whatsoever would absorb his attention. For Fidelis, it was a solemn moment for reflection: He had been an aloof and timid individual at childhood, and as a consequence he had been teased by a number of people, mostly his siblings and peers, which had been a touchy issue that had been damaging emotionally. Growing up, things had improved-as he likes to think-for the better. He considered himself maturely as “reserved and introverted”. But he knew, deep down, it was an illusory notion that had a feel of self-assurance.

It had not been easy making friends in college, but he had managed to secure few, however it had been quite undemanding befriending Timothy. Timothy had been the one doing all the wrong things to attain fame. His sheer lousiness, nerdish and giddy character had turned him into a clown to be picked on by all. The only reason they kicked off as friends was that he was the only person who seemed to be able to accommodate him for the longest possible times. Nonetheless, Timothy has his virtues: loyalty and big heart.

Making friends had been a task. On the other hand, dating a girl was a colossal undertaking, one he had considered almost unfeasible for long, until his desire took a yearning turn. He had spent lonely moments in his room with those “fine” women posing in those magazines, quietly “playing” with himself wishing they were alive and there with him. He had been doing this for long-long enough to actually desire the real thing. Although hormonal craving is one; the desire for a feminine companionship is another. It will be great to relate with a girl on a personal foundation, share her views and regale her company, he thought. At this juncture, his musing piloted its way to the girl-the one he had a die-hard passion for; the one that was doing the yahoozie on the dance floor now, fueling his passion the more.

Alas, he resolves to make his first move on her.

Suddenly, his heart skipped a beat. There was emission of perspirations from his pores, the kind that will leave him drenching soon enough. I am not even close to her and I am this scared. He took deep breathes and glanced over to Timothy who, at that time, was doing that repugnant thing with his lips and tongue. He had warned him several times to shun the act in his presence. He would’ve liked to berate him intensely, but tonight his grace will preside. And apart from that he needed his help. He silently doubted the genuineness about Timothy’s history with girls, but he had no choice but to make use of any available aid. God, I can’t believe the much needed assistance will be sourced from Timothy.

“So, Timothy why…..” he began.

“Apologise first, before you speak to me,” Timothy said cutting him short.

“For what?”

“For regarding me a simpleton.”

“Oh, that. Well I’m sorry”

“Say it as if you mean it,” Timothy emphasized, as the words seemed to come from his teeth.

“I’m Soooooory,” Fidelis mocked. But it was accepted.

“So what can I do you for?”

“What do you propose, Professor Luv, about the issue at hand?” Fidelis asked, conscious about the quite indirect manner the question was framed.

That was what was required to create a platform for a display of Timothy’s ‘ingenuity’. Timothy shifted his chair forward, to an extent that the edge if the table stabbed his trunk, but his interest had been aroused to a point of never-mind-of-anything. He began to speak rapidly and incoherently that Fidelis had difficulty in deciphering what he was saying.

“As I said earlier you’ve to be brave about it. I know you’re kinda shy, but you got to bury that. Girls don’t like shy guys. They like a guy that’s fun and sleek” He paused to take some breath. And then he barks, “Aha, you’ve got to be spontaneoouus” he said pronouncing the accentuated word slowly and wetly with his whole mouth.

“I’ve to be spontaneous?” Fidelis queried.

“Are you going to listen to me, or question my ideas,”

Timothy retorted.

“Go on. I’m sorry” Fidelis apologized as he submitted himself to Timothy’s tutelage.

“Yes. You’ve to be sudden and abrupt in action so as to catch her unawares. It is a before-time principle that has always worked like magic. In fact, it is magic.” Timothy enlightened as he nervously blinked his eyes severally to a point they almost shed tears*.

Somehow, his words got to Fidels’ thoughtfulness and he started to believe.

“What will I say once in her presence?” he inquired humbly.

“Call her by her name gently and….”

“I don’t know her name.”

“What! What do you mean you don’t know her name? You have been this crazy about a girl and you’ve never bothered to find out who she is?”

“I know who she is. I just don’t know her name. I couldn’t ask anybody because that will raise brows.” Fidelis’ explanation made him look exhausted. He was also furious because he seemed incapable. He slumped further into his chair. Later he found his voice.

“So what do I say?

The question calmed Timothy for a moment as he anxiously searched for an answer before finally saying: “Your courage-when you find it-will give you a suitable starter statement or question,” he answered with a confidence of an authoritarian that he is in the field.

Fidelis rested his back on the chair once again with a blank expression on his face.

Timothy is unsure about his stance, so he asked: “What?”

“I’ve to think”

“Keep thinking and the world will pass you by.”

Suddenly, Fidelis stood up and headed towards the swarm of people on the dance floor.

“Where do you think you are going?” Timothy demanded.

“I’m going to get her,” he said with an intense conviction.

“That is it pal. That is what it takes to make it happen…God be with you. I will be watching from here. And don’t forget what I said: Be Spontaneous and brave” Timothy said with thumbs up sign.

Fidelis proceeded on a mission of passion with his courage waxing stronger by the virtue of Timothy’s inspiring lecture. Then again, he paused, and fear started to creep in. No, I will not allow this. He hurriedly stabilized his nerves and advanced, frantically searching for her in the teeming crowd, bumping into people here and there, instigating insults, which he promptly apologised to.

Finally, he found her by the bar; fortunately she was at the extreme edge, where she was considerably far away from the mob trying to order for drinks. And at that moment he could swear she looked much beautiful than he had perceived, as the disco light quietly threw multicoloured shimmers upon her lustrous skin, pronouncing her radiance and height. Too late, the shiver coursed down his spine-as a consequence of his motive-and he got furious with himself. He halted briefly again, but it was obvious this time, it was to no avail, as he felt his trembling fingers, and the sleeves of his shirt quavering; his heart thundering in his ears.

However, in this delicate state he pressed on.

“Wow, Fidelis, you must’ve been dancing all night. I didn’t even know you are the dancing type. You must’ve enjoyed yourself, see how you are sweating all through,

I must say that I…” someone said.

“I don’t have time to talk now,” Fidelis interrupted, without looking at who spoke, as he seemingly sauntered on.

Just then, he was quite close, at least within a range of her sight. He anxiously deliberated on what to say: “I am too certain your favorite color is blue.” No that is lame, he thought. “I love your hair do, I think it is chic.” That is weak. “What is your name?” She do just walk away.

Alas, he was in her presence, close enough to inhale her enchanting fragrance. She had one hand on her hip and was about to order for a drink, but it seemed the bar lady was nowhere to be found. Suddenly, she glanced to his direction-and she maintained it. There was an eye contact connecting both of them for a moment as he nervously lowered his head in “shame”. He hid his trembling fingers behind him as he muttered to himself,

“Be spontaneous and brave.” With this, Fidelis took a deep breath and looked at her. She was still looking his way; and there was this expression on her face he couldn’t put a finger on.Out of the blue, with boldness, utterly spontaneous, like he didn’t care anymore, he proclaimed: “I love you.”

Suddenly, he came back to his senses. Christ! What’ve I done? He thought as he noticed the frown on her face and could testify that she was flabbergasted. Just then, the bar lady appeared and was staring baffled at both of them. Fidelis started muttering gibberish, frenetically searching for whatever to say to amend the circumstance before him.

Shockingly, she lightened up, and assumed that countenance he couldn’t identify; perhaps she is…. He was cut short in this musing, “Is that all you can come up with, ‘I love you’, from nowhere. I doubt even if you know my name”

“I’m sorry, I had no……”

“Fidelis?”

“Yes.” He said quietly after hesitating for a brief moment.

There was no doubt he is surprised

she knows his name because it is obvious. It was boldly written on his face.

“You’ve been silently ‘observing’ me for a while now. Right?” She asked, putting her hands akimbo, making her appear more womanly, and in a queer way, striking. She pushed her face a little towards him, further killing his already dead confidence

“Yes” he mumbled. Once again attesting to her relatively profound knowledge about him.

At that moment he understood the expression he had found hard to discern: she was quite conversant about his clandestine activities as to her.

At that point in time, the bar lady was quite informed about the situation and had taking the customary busy-body position, resting her full torso on the counter with her hands under her chin and a wide-eyed stare at both of them, almost as if her eyes would pop out, apparently enjoying the unfolding drama.

“I have been pretty observant myself too. And I have noticed you,” She said as she sat on a stool by the bar, lightly beaming at him, thus killing the tension in the air-a little bit. Anyone could tell that she had taking charge of the state of affairs, but it seemed Fidelis was quite at ease with that, though his nerves were still failing him.

“It was annoying at first, however I had no choice but to adapt to your peeking attitude after all this while. But sincerely, I anticipated you would do better than this, if you ever….you know….uh….come to me.” She teased with the smile still on her face.

She sat upright with her legs crossed putting her whole weight on the stool, looking at him benignly, though with an appraisal demeanour. The bar lady wasn’t left out, because despite her demanding job, she created time to “monitor” his dilemma.

Both girls focused on him, and he thought it was in a mocking manner.

At that moment, the boisterous surrounding seemed to calm, as he gathered himself together. He spoke with a raised voice trying to overcome its distortion due to trembling.

“I know your favourite colour is blue,” he pronounced distinctively and gently.

Her smile was triggered by impetus, and it eased him greatly.

“Your hair is really nice. I think is chic,”

“Thank you,” she smiled.

They both relaxed for a while, though the silence between was tensed and awkward. They looked at each other again and both were too shy to maintain eye contact.

Then he asked, “May I know your name?”

“Nina.”

“I am Fidelis,” he said without much reflection before pronouncing his name.

They all burst into laughter-including the bar lady.

“Why don’t you buy her a drink,” the bar lady suggested. “But ask her first,”she advised.

“Do you mind me buying you a drink,” he asked with an exaggerated politeness.

“Yes, you can,” She answered with a chuckle and exaggerated curtsy.

At that moment, he felt his happy-ever-after had just begun.

About the Author

The author is an avid researcher in all fields. He is an open-minded fellow in all subjects and has equally developed a mastery in most of them. He writes to educate others.

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