Tattoes and Body Jewellery

As a rape victim I feel like a ghost….?

I feel like a ghost…I feel like I was battered out of my body and now I kind of haunt my flesh. I feel like covering it with tattoos and piercings… maybe trying self abuse…. since the pleasure seems to get me deeper in trouble. Any advice ? Somebody help me with something that invades my soul and gives me some freedom plz.

Do you realize once you begin doing every thing you are talking about doing to yourself you are actually believing what your rapist has told you, whether or not he spoke it verbally. Let me put it to you this way I have been gang banged, raped three to four times and the last time my own sister set me up.
She told me to watch for this guy who was after me and from the onset I made up my mind to stay away from him. A week later we had gone to this house; my first time there. He walked in the door and when everyone left I thought he had gone too and you know something I learnt later on that when we had gone to that house that my sister actually knew he lived there.
The one secret I learned is they want you to feel as bad as they do. They want you to blame yourself and in that way they put their guilt on you. In all truth and honesty you do not have to blame yourself; I chose not to blame myself; I accepted it happened to me and from there I decided which road I wanted to travel on. I chose the road to good and positive thinking and a pure attitude. Some people need counseling to achieve this I just seemed to be gifted with it.
I hope that you can find a way to reach these same goals, cause you will feel so much better. You deserve to feel better.
I would like to mention that a lot of women and I don’t know if you are one of them have family members to go to; I never did – my mum is of the thinking (ever she knew) that I let the men rape me. You never let anyone rape you because then it is not called rape.
Most important of all you have to believe that you deserve you feel better.

Me spinning a chair with my ears