Tattoes and Body Jewellery

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What Is Hidden In Online Dating Profile Turn-Offs And Turn-Ons?

Many online dating site member profiles have sections where members can list their ‘Turn-Offs’ and ‘Turn-Ons’. You see a very wide variety of what people find exciting on the one hand, or an absolute no-no on the other.

For me, these are fascinating topics. It’s probably ok if something which you like – e.g. skinny dipping – does not appear under the ‘Turn Ons’ heading of a profile you find attractive, as long as it does not appear under the ‘Turn Offs’ heading – that may well make you move on to look at another profile. However, some ladies have low self esteem in regard of body shape (in many cases without justification). I have been told that the same also applies to some men. So, a dislike of skinny dipping could really mean something else.

Tattoos often appear under the ladies’ ‘Turn Offs’ heading, so if you are a man and have tattoos then you will need to work out a way of handling that in your profile or narrative. There are the usual obvious issues about location of tattoos and ex-girlfriends names, but generally honesty is the best policy. After all, nearly all young navy ratings collect tatoos as a rite of passage. Since their younger days, they’ve grown up and when some spare cash is available then many plan to have them removed. So, that is a way it can be handled in the profile if you are concious of your tattoos. However, if tattoos are a serious interest as body art for you and you have a greta collection of them, then you are probably seeking a dating site with that orientation.

Tattoos are increasingly visible on ladies, as are piercings. Piercings are not at unusal on men either, though there’s only one I’d have done and that would be for rounding Cape Horn – a gold earring on the ear which was nearest the Horn on rounding. One day maybe! Depending which way round I went though, it could be incorrectly indicative of my sexual orientation. I’ll have to think about. Maybe one on each ear to confuse the issue!

Many ladies have ’showing affection in public’ as a ‘Turn On’ in their profile. This could be an issue for some men, so you’ll need to consider this if it’s a difficulty for you. A few ladies don’t mention it, and I’ve only known one for whom it was a ‘Turn Off’. It turned out that this lady suffered from Asperger’s Syndrome, and she hadn’t connected the two facts until I suggested it to her.

A few ladies are confident enough to list ‘Erotica’ as a ‘Turn On’ in their profiles. I avoid it in my own (male) profile as I think it could be seen in a negative light by ladies. I leave it as an item to be explored later (in the relationship, not in this article)!

Wealth and Power appear about 50/50 as ‘Turn Offs’ and ‘Turn Ons’ in my experience of female profiles. I do know that there are guys who misrepresent their financial status, but like everything else in a profile, the truth will out eventually. If you are a guy though, and not wealthy and powerful, then there isn’t much point in taking that lady’s profile further if wealth and power are a ‘Turn-on’ for her!

Financial status though, is a topic for another article of its own, and usually has a profile section of its own.

So, before you ‘go public’ with your list of turn-offs and turn-ons, pause and consider how they might affect your dating success.

Of course, discovering someone else’s turn-offs and turn-ons over time can be part of the fun of a relationship. The best part though is when you help the other person discover a turn-on they didn’t previously know about! If you didn’t know it either then that’s twice the fun!

(c) 2009-10 Phil Marks

About the Author

Top dating tips, online dating experiences, stories and guidance from an acute observer of the process with more than five years online dating history. Learn the secrets of the process at =>
http://www.eZeeFriends.com

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